What is mental health?

Mental health is a state of well-being. A person who is mentally healthy can:

• work productively
• cope with the normal stresses of life
• contribute to their community
• realise their own potential
• often see difficulties from multiple perspectives

Just like our physical body, our mental health can be affected by different conditions and illnesses.

Mental health conditions can affect everyone, regardless of your sex or gender.

This page is about mental health resources for men; however, this page may be helpful to anyone.

Recognising mental illness

Everyone has ups and downs in their life. All people experience unpleasant feelings at times, like:

• sadness
• anger
• hopelessness
• despair

However, this could be a sign of a mental illness if:

• these feelings don't go away
• they make it difficult for you to function normally
• they are causing you distress

A mental illness is a health problem that significantly affects how you:

• think
• behave
• interact with others
• function at home, school or work

Mental health conditions include:

• depression
• anxiety
• schizophrenia
• bipolar disorder
• addiction(s)

You might have a mental health problem, if you:

• lose your temper over small things
• have ongoing negative thoughts that feel true
• take more risks
• are having trouble sleeping
• notice a change in your appetite
• don't socialise as much as you used to
• are enjoying activities and hobbies less

What are some common mental health issues for men?

Many things in life can negatively affect your mental and emotional wellbeing.

Some common reasons you might be stressed, anxious or angry are:

• work-related pressures — including unemployment or retirement
• suffering from a physical illness
• experiencing relationship problems such as a separation or divorce
• feeling lonely or are socially isolated
• financial stress
• being a new parent
• drug and alcohol use or other addictions such as gambling

If you're a new parent, adjusting to family life can be stressful. Learning to raise a child can place a lot of pressure on you. Perinatal depression and anxiety are common and can affect either parent.

In Australia, men may face stereotypes about what it means to be a man. You may feel pressure to:

• be dominant and tough
• provide financially for your family
• be self-reliant
• think logically
• be independent
• not show emotion
• be successful

Some of these values can be helpful for a limited time. But, feeling pressured to meet these expectations all the time can be distressing. You might feel:

• unable to express your emotions (how you feel)
• find it difficult or embarrassing to seek help when you need it

This can lead to mental health problems, and can impact your physical health.

Pressures like these can be experienced by all men. This includes men from different cultures and countries, and transgender men.

Why is my mental health important?

Your mental health is an important part of your overall health and wellbeing. You need good mental health to:

• help you get through life's challenges and develop positive coping strategies
• have healthy relationships
• enjoy life

Your mental health is like your physical health — it needs looking after.

How can I improve my mental health and wellbeing?

Good mental health and wellbeing mean different things to different people. Wellbeing can mean that you are able to enjoy and appreciate:

• your day-to-day life
• your environment — noticing the small things
• those around you

Looking after yourself

There are practical things you can do to help support your mental health:

• eat well, get plenty of sleep, and exercise regularly
• spend time with your friends and family
• do activities you enjoy besides work
• take time to relax, but avoid using alcohol as a distraction
• set yourself realistic goals

Use the 80/20 rule. If you eat well and exercise regularly most of the time, it doesn't matter if you eat chocolate or miss one exercise session every now and then.

If you know that you have a mental health problem, there are things you can try:

• Focus on the present moment, and the positive things that you notice. Try and look at all the evidence, not just believe the negative thoughts.
• Manage your emotions in a healthy way, such as by writing them down or talking about them.
• Try to understand your feelings — think about how they make you feel physically and why they are happening.
• Focus on changing what you can, and accepting what you can't control.

Getting support

If you're doing what you can, but you're still struggling, it could be time to look for some more support.

If you are battling with a mental health issue, you can speak to your doctor. They can organise a mental health plan and link you to more support, such as a:

• counsellor
• psychologist or psychiatrist (a doctor who specialises in mental health)

It's also important to talk about how you feel with people you trust.

How can I talk about mental health?

Talking about what you are going through with someone you trust can be a great help. This might be a:

• partner
• friend
• family member
• colleague

It can be difficult to speak about mental health for a lot of people. You may hear phrases like “keep your chin up”, “look on the bright side” or “there are people worse off”. These can feel dismissive and make you feel like your mental health is not worth talking about.

It's important to remember that problems with mental health are:

• common
• not a sign of weakness
• important to address — no matter how big or small the problem

It takes courage and strength to admit if you have a problem, and to look for help. Give yourself permission to be human and speak to those you trust.

You might find it uncomfortable to talk about your mental health. It can help to:

• remember that you don't have to share everything — only what you are comfortable with
• ask your friend or family member not share your conversation with others
• tell your friend of family member if you would like advice, or if you just need them to listen

You can also watch for signs of mental health problems in your friends and family.

If you think a mate is struggling with a mental health issue, you can:

• ask him how he is doing and let him know that you care
• listen when he speaks and ask questions to show that you are listening
• acknowledge and validate their feelings without judging them — it is normal to react to stressful situations
• make sure they are safe — if you are concerned a friend might be suicidal, don't be afraid to ask them about it

I want to change my behaviour — where do I start?

Coping with a mental health problem can be difficult. Sometimes we deal with our problems in unhealthy ways that hurt ourselves and others, like:

• addiction to drugs and alcohol
• gambling
• violent behaviour
• taking risks and being reckless

Males are more likely to die from destructive coping mechanisms than females.

There are ways that you can change any destructive habits you might have.

You can also talk to your doctor or a mental health professional for advice on making healthy habits.

You can read more about anger management and overcoming addiction.

Set specific goals

Set specific goals for yourself on what you want to do. Instead of “I want to be less angry”, you could say “I will calm myself before responding to things that make me angry”.

Be realistic

Be realistic and accept that change takes time. For example, if you want to stop smoking, you can first aim to smoke less each day. Acknowledge that change takes courage and is often hard. But suffering with mental health or addiction is hard too.

Make things easy for yourself

Make change as easy for yourself as possible. For example, if you want to drink less alcohol, you can stop buying it.

Be patient

Be kind to yourself as you attempt to make changes. Change does not happen overnight. There will be times where you may go back to your old habit — this is common. Keep at it and be proud of the effort you are putting in.

What should I do if I have suicidal thoughts?

If you feel suicidal, you are not alone. You may feel like ending your life if you are overwhelmed negative feelings.

Suicidal feelings can be very painful, and you may feel like a burden. Remember, you are not alone. It's important to reach out for support if you need to from people you trust.

There are organisations who can support you and resources listed at the end of this page.

If you are in a crisis, there are ways that you can try to calm yourself.

Body scans

Lie down and take slow breaths. Tense the muscles in your feet and let them relax. Do this with different muscles, working your way up your body.

Breathing exercises

Take a deep breath in through your nose and hold your breath before exhaling. Count to 3 for each inhale and exhale.

Practicing mindfulness

Trying to stop upsetting thoughts or thinking about what might happen can be distressing. Instead, try to accept your feelings and focus on the moment.

You can read more about mindfulness.

Resources and support

There are online resources that can provide more tips for good mental health and apps for building wellbeing. There are many other organisations you can contact for mental health support and information.

Telephone or online mental health resources can often be effective, especially if you aren't able to access a health service, or find talking to someone face-to-face difficult. Here are some telephone and online resources to try:

• Lifeline for anyone having a personal crisis — call 13 11 14 or chat online
• MensLine Australia is an online counselling and forum for men — call 1300 78 99 78.
• The Suicide Call Back Service can provide immediate support to anyone feeling suicidal — call 1300 659 467.
• Dads In Distress is a peer support for separated dads — call 1300 853 437.
• Head to Health — for advice and to get connected to local mental health services, you can call 1800 595 212. Check the operating times.
• SANE Australia is for people living with a mental illness — call 1800 187 263 or chat online.
• Beyond Blue has health resources specifically designed for men of any age https://www.beyondblue.org.au/mental-health/k10— call 1300 22 4636.
• MoodGYM is a free online cognitive behaviour therapy program.
• 13YARN — for Aboriginal & Torres Strait Islander in crisis and need support — call 13 92 76.
• Brother to Brother is a crisis line for Aboriginal men — call 1800 435 799
• If you speak a language other than English Embrace Multicultural Mental Health has services and information available.
• If you are experiencing mental health issues related to your sexuality or gender identity (LGBTIQA+), Qlife provides a counselling and referral service.
• The G'Day Line is a free service to help older Australians manage isolation and loneliness — call 1300 920 552.

You can also call the healthdirect helpline on 1800 022 222 (known as NURSE-ON-CALL in Victoria). A registered nurse is available to speak with 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.