Sexual desire rises and falls over time for no apparent reason. It is very common for people to lose interest in sex from time to time.
Your libido can rise due to things like relationship pleasures, good health, fitness, holidays and relaxation.
Your libido can fall due to things in your life like relationship problems, the birth of a child, stress, overwork or personal issues.
Other things that can impair your sex drive include:
- low levels of the hormone testosterone
- depression or fatigue
- being in pain
- some medicines, such as antidepressants
- some medical conditions like obstructive sleep apnoea or diabetes
If you have lost interest in sex because of stress, personal or relationship issues, it may be helpful to talk to your partner about how you are feeling. Not talking about it can sometimes make sexual issues more difficult.
If you feel uneasy talking about sex, try asking your partner how he or she feels about your sex life first. Reassure your partner that you still love and enjoy close contact with him or her.
If you lose interest in sex for no apparent reason, and you or your partner are worried about it, consult your doctor.
Remember there’s more to sex than having intercourse. If your interest in having sex has decreased, you may want to try some more sensual methods of becoming aroused. These include:
- exploring and caressing each other’s bodies
- taking a bath or shower together
- having a massage
- kissing each other slowly and in sensual places (such as the thigh)
- undressing each other
Treating low sex drive
If you’re worried about low sex drive, see your doctor. They may suggest you alter your medications or cut down on alcohol or drug use. They will check to see there is no medical reason for your low sex drive, such as diabetes. In some men, testosterone therapy can help, or your doctor may recommend relationship counselling.
Looking after yourself
Leading a healthy life may improve your chances of having a healthy sex life. You could try:
- losing weight if you are overweight
- reducing the amount of alcohol you drink
- not using illegal drugs
- taking regular exercise
- giving up smoking
Not sure what to do next?
If you are still concerned about your loss of male libido, why not use healthdirect’s online Symptom Checker to get advice on when to seek medical attention.
The Symptom Checker guides you to the next appropriate healthcare steps, whether it’s self care, talking to a health professional, going to a hospital or calling triple zero (000).
Learn more here about the development and quality assurance of healthdirect content.
Last reviewed: November 2019