What is anger?

Anger is a normal human emotion. It can happen when we think something is unfair or feel threatened.

Feelings of anger can range from mild annoyance to intense rage.

Everyone feels angry sometimes. Anger can be healthy and necessary at times. It can motivate you to change a situation.

It's important to express anger in a healthy way. Unhealthy expressions of anger can cause problems or harm. For example, anger expressed as violence can cause physical injury and even death.

If you, or someone you know, is in immediate danger of hurting themselves or others, call triple zero (000).

What are the signs and symptoms of anger?

When you get angry, your body produces hormones called adrenaline and noradrenaline. This is your body's 'fight or flight' response. The hormones make your heart rate and blood pressure go up.

You may:

• feel hot, flushed
• start sweating
• clench your muscles
• feel like there is pressure in your head
• feel like your heart is pounding
• breathe faster than normal

Emotionally, you may feel like you're:

• losing patience
• irritated
• on edge
• frustrated
• overwhelmed

Is anger a mental health condition?

No, anger is not a mental health condition. It's normal and helpful to feel angry sometimes.

If you have a mental health condition you may be more likely to feel anger. These include:

• depression
• agoraphobia
• borderline personality disorder
• bipolar disorder
• schizophrenia
• oppositional defiant disorder

What causes feelings of anger?

Anger is a normal response to situations that:

• feel unfair
• are embarrassing
• are distressing or frightening
• are a threat

Threats are situations that may cause harm to you physically, emotionally or socially.

You may find that certain situations are likely to trigger an anger response. If you feel anxious, resentful or overwhelmed, you may be more likely to become angry.

Do I have an anger problem?

Everyone feels angry from time to time. Problems happen when anger is not managed properly.

If you don't manage your anger, it can lead to aggressive behaviour like:

• yelling or making verbal threats
• throwing things
• leaving a situation suddenly or “storming out”

It's not okay to express anger in ways that can hurt you, other people or objects. There are healthier ways to express your anger.

When should I seek help?

If you think you have problems managing your anger, it may help to ask yourself these questions:

• Has anger caused any problems in your relationships or work life?
• Do you sometimes have trouble controlling your behaviour when you're angry?
• Have you ever regretted something you did while angry?
• Have you ever become so angry that you damaged things or became abusive or violent?
• Have other people mentioned that anger might be a problem for you?

If you answer 'yes' to any of these questions, consider talking to your doctor or a mental health professional. They can help you learn how to better manage your anger.

How do I talk to someone about anger?

If you are having problems with your anger, it's important to find a way to talk to your loved ones. Telling them how you are feeling can help them to support you.

If someone has done something to upset or anger you, talk to them about how they have made you feel. You can do this calmly. You can suggest things to help avoid a difficult situation in the future.

If someone else's anger problems are affecting you, there are ways to talk about it.

• Bring up the topic calmly in a space that is safe for you both.
• Reassure the person that you want to listen and support them.
• Encourage the person to seek professional help.

Focus on your own feelings, so that the person does not feel blamed or attacked. Instead of saying “you are making me concerned”, say “I am feeling concerned”. Using 'I' language is helpful in many situations.

You can read more about talking to your doctor about mental health.

What are the treatments for anger problems?

There are different ways that you can manage and treat anger problems.

Anger self-management

You can learn to manage your anger yourself.

Start by trying to recognise when you become angry. If you notice you are getting angry, you can learn how to calm yourself down.

You can express anger in a respectful way. It's important to remember that other people are not responsible for making you angry. You can choose how you react.

If you feel yourself getting angry, there things you can do to keep control of your anger.

Identify the things that make you angry	If you know the things that frustrate you and make you angry, you may be able to avoid them or do things differently. When you start to feel angry, pause and ask yourself why. If there is something clearly making you angry, acknowledge it. This includes asking yourself if your reaction is appropriate for the situation. There may be another way to look at it. This can help you find a solution more calmly.
Spot the physical warning signs of anger	If you can identify the physical warning signs of anger, you can calm yourself before your anger becomes harder to control.
Time out	'Time out' means stepping away from a situation and giving yourself space. It‘s OK to say, 'I need to take a break — I'll come back in half an hour'. This gives you a chance to 'cool down' and view the situation more clearly.
Controlled breathing	Try taking 5 long, deep breaths and slowing your breathing. Making your exhale (breath out) longer than your breath in helps. While you're breathing, try to relax your muscles.
Talk yourself down	Telling yourself you can handle the situation can help calm you down. This is called positive self-talk. Try to tell yourself positive things, like: 'Okay, I can handle this' or 'I'm not going to let this get to me'. Try to avoid negative statements that might make you feel angrier. This means avoiding harshly criticising yourself or others.
Distraction	Shifting your focus from a situation to something else, even briefly, can help diffuse feelings of anger. Try distracting yourself by: listening to music counting to 10 calling a friend
Gentle exercise	Gentle exercise can: relax your muscles change your perspective make you feel calmer This includes activities like: going for a walk with your dog or a friend doing yoga stretching

When someone else is angry

If you are experiencing someone else's anger, there are ways you can help calm the situation down.

• Let the person finish what they want to say — this can help you process what they are saying and help you both stay calm.
• Make eye contact with the person — this can help reassure them that you are listening.
• Try to empathise with why they are angry.
• Once the person has shared the issue and released their frustration, you can offer to help them solve the problem.

Other treatment options

If you are having anger problems, psychological support and therapy can help.

It is normal to feel anger. Anger management does not dismiss your anger. Instead, it will help you to:

• learn ways to manage your anger in a healthy way
• change your way of thinking in situations that make you angry
• change how you respond to situations which trigger your anger

There are different types of anger management therapies and training courses. These can be done:

• individually
• in a group
• online

Counselling or cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT) may help you see and challenge unhelpful thoughts and behaviours.

Anger management training can teach you different skills, such as:

• relaxation skills to ease tension in your body
• problem solving to help you identify situations that might trigger an angry response
• communication skills to learn how to handle difficult situations in a calmer way

If you feel that your anger is out of control, it may help to talk to a doctor or psychologist. You may be eligible for a Medicare rebate if your doctor refers you to a psychologist.

For advice and to get connected to local mental health services, call Medicare Mental Health on 1800 595 212. Check the operating times.

What are the consequences of uncontrolled anger?

If you have anger problems that are left unmanaged, this can damage your relationships with others.

It can also damage your health. Anger can lead to:

• hypertension (high blood pressure)
• depression
• anxiety
• heart problems

Resources and support

There are organisations that can help you to manage your anger or deal with the anger problems of someone else. You can visit:

• Relationships Australia for information on dealing with anger — you can also call on 1300 364 277
• MensLine Australia website for support for Australian men, including an Anger Management Toolkit — you can also call on 1300 78 99 78
• HealthyMale for health information for Australian men and boys, including information on how to manage anger
• Kids Helpline for young people aged 5 to 25 years — 1800 55 1800
• Lifeline for crisis support — 13 11 14

You can also access SANE's range of free mental health supports on their website, including anger management tips.

If you think you are at risk of domestic and family violence, call 1800RESPECT on 1800 737 732.

Languages other than English

Visit the Embrace Multicultural Mental Health website for resources in languages other than English.

Information for Aboriginal and/or Torres Strait Islander peoples

Visit the 13YARN website for resources or call 13 92 76 to talk with an Aboriginal or Torres Strait Islander Crisis Supporter.

You can also call the healthdirect helpline on 1800 022 222 (known as NURSE-ON-CALL in Victoria). A registered nurse is available to speak with you 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.